These butterflies aren’t anything new, especially for me; I
get them over simple things like making a phone call or going to a party or
gathering with a lot of people. These butterflies have just become part of life,
most of the time they are frustrating. I wish I could just do these things without
having to push past that feeling. That constant nagging that something could go
wrong…that I could say something wrong and look stupid. However there is a good
side to these butterflies, I get butterflies when I’m reuniting with friends
after a long time apart, when I’m picking my hubby up from the airport.
These butterflies…oh these butterflies…I’m learning daily
how to embrace them. These butterflies often precede something incredible
happening, sometimes they are my internal warning system. They are my daily
reminder that I have the Holy Spirit. That gentle nudging, to let go, move
forward, act, encourage, speak, go, listen. I’ve learned a lot through my life
that these butterflies are worth listening to, and more importantly worth
embracing. Although I’m not great at embracing them as I feel I should be. I’m
afraid of where they will take me. What boundaries
that I have put in place will be pushed? Is it worth pushing through it? How can I
ignore this? Won’t this feeling pass?
Well let me share my most recent experiences with my
butterflies…
The first started with an outing with our Sunday school
class…our class is awesome. Each month we plan a service Sunday where we as a
class and sometimes we are able to even take our families along. Well this last
month we chose to serve some people in our community lunch. (A few things about
me 1. I love food and I love cooking for others 2. As you probably could assume
from above I’m not a confident conversationalist) So I’m all about the food
part and serving the second half…ummm not so much…so despite my greatest
efforts to skip this service Sunday. Things aligned where there was no excuses
left (except for me to flat out say I didn’t want to go) my plans to pick up my
friend from the airport switched to the day before, the boys were in great
moods. We were meant to be there…I wasn’t comfortable…as Sunday progressed my anxiety
levels rose…I prayed for peace, a calming….I had a feeling we were called to go
so by the end of it I embraced the butterflies packed up some food and we
headed to church. We briefed our boys who were as equally excited about
participating as their daddy and we headed out. I’m so socially awkward
sometimes…but do you know what?? That doesn’t matter. We weren’t called there
for me to engage the community we were serving. Sure maybe I made an impact but
I was there to support those who are GREAT at communicating. We are all created
equally, we are the body of Christ all working together to further the kingdom.
Without a single part of the body functioning as it should, the body isn’t efficient;
it’s not fulfilling its purpose. I was reminded about 1 Corinthians 12:12-31 What
I learned from embracing these butterflies…God isn’t calling me to be someone I’m
not created to be he’s calling me to be me to excel there and trust him in
that. He knows when I need to be stretched and I know when he’s stretching me…he
won’t blind side me with that. I trust him…he’s well worth your trust.
The second was a road trip. Oh man I was anxious about this
trip…I wasn’t sure if it was the good or bad anxiety. After weighing all things
we came to the conclusion that I was just over thinking it.SOO despite my
greatest reservations our two little boys and I packed up the car and headed to
Missouri leaving daddy at home. The plan was for us to drive and him to fly up
and meet us when he could get off work. I was afraid of all the what if’s…turns
out I have a very vivid imagination…not in a good way. However I decided to
embrace it…yes it was messy, it was long, it was crazy but we got an extra 3
days and it was so relaxing. I learned to tell my imagination to chill, to
embrace the craziness that is road tripping with two boys under 4 alone, and trust
that in the end it would be worth it. You know the less I let myself think and
dwell about things and the faster I turn them over…the easier it is.
Sure its getting a tiny bit easier to embrace my butterflies
but its hard…I don’t like them most of the time and I’m still running away from
some butterflies but that’s another story for another day. The butterflies that
are telling you…you’re anxious about stopping by a friend’s house are worth
embracing, the butterflies that are pushing your comfort zone in good ways are
worth embracing. Whatever, your butterflies embrace them. Get used to that
feeling in your gut…embrace it, listen to it, pray about it.
Blessings and Love…Until we meet again
1 Corinthians 12:12-31
Unity
and Diversity in the Body
12 Just as a body, though one, has many parts, but all its many
parts form one body, so it is with Christ. 13 For we were all
baptized by[c] one Spirit
so as to form one body—whether Jews or Gentiles, slave or free—and we were all
given the one Spirit to drink. 14 Even so the body is not made
up of one part but of many.
15 Now if the foot should say, “Because I am not a hand, I do
not belong to the body,” it would not for that reason stop being part of the
body. 16 And if the ear should say, “Because I am not an eye, I
do not belong to the body,” it would not for that reason stop being part of the
body. 17 If the whole body were an eye, where would the sense
of hearing be? If the whole body were an ear, where would the sense of smell
be? 18 But in fact God has placed the parts in the body, every
one of them, just as he wanted them to be. 19 If they were all
one part, where would the body be? 20 As it is, there are many
parts, but one body.
21 The eye cannot say to the hand, “I don’t need you!” And the
head cannot say to the feet, “I don’t need you!” 22 On the
contrary, those parts of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable, 23 and
the parts that we think are less honorable we treat with special honor. And the
parts that are unpresentable are treated with special modesty, 24 while
our presentable parts need no special treatment. But God has put the body
together, giving greater honor to the parts that lacked it, 25 so
that there should be no division in the body, but that its parts should have
equal concern for each other. 26 If one part suffers, every
part suffers with it; if one part is honored, every part rejoices with it.
27 Now you are the body of Christ, and each one of you is a
part of it. 28 And God has placed in the church first of all
apostles, second prophets, third teachers, then miracles, then gifts of
healing, of helping, of guidance, and of different kinds of tongues. 29 Are
all apostles? Are all prophets? Are all teachers? Do all work miracles? 30 Do
all have gifts of healing? Do all speak in tongues[d]? Do all
interpret? 31 Now eagerly desire the greater gifts.
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