When I was on a mission trip in Australia, that saying was one of my favorite takeaways not to mention all the fabulous food :) ...the thing is I worry, I have anxiety sometimes about the craziest things. My hubs says its because of how introverted I am, nevertheless I worry. I have been striving over the last few years to turn those worries over to God and just let go, trust him in all things. Man its hard, but every time I feel it coming on I start praying about the very thing I'm worrying about, and instead of dwelling, I begin to tell God all the things I'm thankful for. It helps a lot. In some ways it seems to be getting better but really it has only gotten worse over the years...my boys give me a lot of things to be anxious and worry about...
Well a few weeks ago, I heard words out of my sweet 4 year olds mouth I wasn't expecting to hear. We had just got back from our Christmas trip and he said, "mom I'm worried about grandma and grandpa bill." NOOOOO!!!! Dear Jesus I don't want to pass this on....But instead of reacting (thankfully), I began asking, I asked him why he was worried, he said because they were alone, because we weren't there. I told him, that grandma and grandpa were doing great, that they missed us but there was no reason to worry and I told him that when I worry, I pray for what I'm worrying about, so we walked through it, Jesus be with grandma and grandpa...and we moved forward
A few days later we were talking about one of his friends that he wanted to go see, after telling him that his friend and his mom were on a trip, he dropped it. The following day he said, "mom I'm worried about my friend Micah and Mrs. Brigitte." I asked him what we do when we worry or feel worried about people and he said "pray".....AHHHHH this one an epic mommy moment I couldn't have been more proud of him, thank you Jesus!!....so that's what we did we said a quick prayer for God to protect our friends and to get them home safely and like all four year olds he moved on.
I'm grateful for these moments, I don't like that my boy worries but its not surprising either. It truly is amazing what all they inherit from us. I'm grateful for my journey with worry because without it, I wouldn't have the same advice for him.
The other day I was with a group of friends and we were discussing Romans 8:28, but really I love this portion of scripture...good stuff.
Romans 8:28
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.
My anxiety and worry is unprecedented because I have the God of the universe who loves me dearly and can handle so much more than my insignificant worries. The beautiful thing, he cares about each and every one of our cares, worry's, and desires. He longs for us to bring those before him and seek him in our human finiteness. He knows us fully and intimately, he knows how many hairs are on our heads, all the tears that have fallen.
So no matter your worries or mine, God's got it and he is working his plan together for the greater good, even though it doesn't often look like that. I mean just a few verses before Romans 8:28 in Romans 8:22-28 it says:
We know that the whole creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth right up to the present time. No only so, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for our adoption to sonship, the redemption of our bodies. For in this hope we were saved. But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what we already have? But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently.
In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans. And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit., because the Spirit intercedes for God's people in accordance with the will of God.
Thank you God for loving us so much to know that we need someone to go before us on our behalf who knows us better than we know ourselves. He knows my worries and anxious thoughts and not only does he bring me peace and thanksgiving, he intercedes for me, always working things for the greatest good.
So to all my fellow worriers, take heart, see God and ask how you can best deal with your worry and anxiety, and lean in to that guidance.
Peace be with you and prayers for you. No worries friend our God is bigger.
Thursday, January 29, 2015
Saturday, January 24, 2015
Running Buddy
I run now...that is still weird to think/say. I have heard the expression countless times about how life is like a race, 5k, sprint, marathon, you name it.
I'd say life is like a marathon, from what I know about them from being married to a marathoner. Here's why...
You see a marathon, like life has many different stages. First you start your marathon journey by training...growing up...Then you have the few days prior to the race where you prepare your body and your brain for the upcoming miles, you rest, you take away the miles so your body rebuilds...your young adult life...Next the race, in the beginning of the race you often wonder WHY AM I RUNNING?? how much further do I have? Am I really ready for this? Did I train enough? Am I a good enough runner? ...again id say young adult life...
Then you get comfortable you find your groove, you find your pace group and you start feeling like you can do this. you know this season in life where you start getting the hang of things, learning from mistakes, kids chill out for a while, find a career you enjoy, good friends...
Next comes the wall, your body literally wants to stop, you think in your brain, there is NO possible way for me to take another step forward let alone finish this race. This is just not going to happen....mid life crisis (need I say more)
Then you blast through that wall, you get fuel on board, you find your focus, that drive that was hiding comes out and you find the perseverance to push yourself forward to your goal. I'm going to lump the last part of life in here..
Last but not least Finishing...oh man can you fathom you have come 25 miles you see that GLORIOUS 26 mile marker and KNOW you got this...all you have is .2 miles. .2 that's it. holy cow 26 miles I've ran 26 miles. There is a beautiful thing that happens between 26 and the finish line that's my favorite place to be well almost my favorite...(technically its where families are reunited but i'll get there) You see as you are waiting to witness your loved one cross the finish line you see all these people who have just overcome, conquered themselves, learned something powerful, you see raw, real, perseverance. You see first timers all the way to seasoned veterans who are driven to conquer that small voice that tells them they cant. I imagine that is how life is as you age, that as you look back you see all that you accomplished, all that you have overcome, the self doubt, the difficult times but the sweet moments of the conquered hills and miles that have passed. After you finish you get to meet up with those who love you and have come out to cheer you on, there are lots of tears here, lots of joy...
the other thing is, is your running buddy, oh I couldn't do it without my run buddy...we have all been on those runs alone where its so hard to keep moving forward....my run buddy keeps me accountable, she keeps me going when I want to stop because every muscle in my legs hurt. The cool thing about having a run buddy in the middle of the marathon especially when you hit your wall is they keep you grounded, they remind you that you can keep going, that you have what it takes all you have to do is get some fuel and refocus.
I love my run buddies, the ones that run with me, the ones that are just living life alongside me, encouraging me, helping me become a better mom and wife, a better follower of Jesus, oh my run buddies, I'm so grateful for God for putting them in my life.
Another reason I Love these run buddies we have alongside us...last week we had our youngest little boy in church with us and we also took him to our sunday school class, instead of these sweet Jesus loving people being annoyed that our rambunctious 2 year old was in there they embraced him, loved on him, played with him, sat with him, oh it was such a sweet time, it blessed my heart. I couldn't do it without these friends.
Hebrews 12:1-3
Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinner, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.
I'd say life is like a marathon, from what I know about them from being married to a marathoner. Here's why...
You see a marathon, like life has many different stages. First you start your marathon journey by training...growing up...Then you have the few days prior to the race where you prepare your body and your brain for the upcoming miles, you rest, you take away the miles so your body rebuilds...your young adult life...Next the race, in the beginning of the race you often wonder WHY AM I RUNNING?? how much further do I have? Am I really ready for this? Did I train enough? Am I a good enough runner? ...again id say young adult life...
Then you get comfortable you find your groove, you find your pace group and you start feeling like you can do this. you know this season in life where you start getting the hang of things, learning from mistakes, kids chill out for a while, find a career you enjoy, good friends...
Next comes the wall, your body literally wants to stop, you think in your brain, there is NO possible way for me to take another step forward let alone finish this race. This is just not going to happen....mid life crisis (need I say more)
Then you blast through that wall, you get fuel on board, you find your focus, that drive that was hiding comes out and you find the perseverance to push yourself forward to your goal. I'm going to lump the last part of life in here..
Last but not least Finishing...oh man can you fathom you have come 25 miles you see that GLORIOUS 26 mile marker and KNOW you got this...all you have is .2 miles. .2 that's it. holy cow 26 miles I've ran 26 miles. There is a beautiful thing that happens between 26 and the finish line that's my favorite place to be well almost my favorite...(technically its where families are reunited but i'll get there) You see as you are waiting to witness your loved one cross the finish line you see all these people who have just overcome, conquered themselves, learned something powerful, you see raw, real, perseverance. You see first timers all the way to seasoned veterans who are driven to conquer that small voice that tells them they cant. I imagine that is how life is as you age, that as you look back you see all that you accomplished, all that you have overcome, the self doubt, the difficult times but the sweet moments of the conquered hills and miles that have passed. After you finish you get to meet up with those who love you and have come out to cheer you on, there are lots of tears here, lots of joy...
the other thing is, is your running buddy, oh I couldn't do it without my run buddy...we have all been on those runs alone where its so hard to keep moving forward....my run buddy keeps me accountable, she keeps me going when I want to stop because every muscle in my legs hurt. The cool thing about having a run buddy in the middle of the marathon especially when you hit your wall is they keep you grounded, they remind you that you can keep going, that you have what it takes all you have to do is get some fuel and refocus.
I love my run buddies, the ones that run with me, the ones that are just living life alongside me, encouraging me, helping me become a better mom and wife, a better follower of Jesus, oh my run buddies, I'm so grateful for God for putting them in my life.
Another reason I Love these run buddies we have alongside us...last week we had our youngest little boy in church with us and we also took him to our sunday school class, instead of these sweet Jesus loving people being annoyed that our rambunctious 2 year old was in there they embraced him, loved on him, played with him, sat with him, oh it was such a sweet time, it blessed my heart. I couldn't do it without these friends.
Hebrews 12:1-3
Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinner, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.
Tuesday, January 20, 2015
true confessions tuesday
Ok let me just tell you, when you sit down with friends and you have an epiphany about how you feel like you don't measure up to others facebook update worthy wins, you decide that real life posts are actually where its at. I mean everyone appreciates our vacay pics, potty training, made it through the store without a meltdown, moms weekends away or the ever epic I did this to make a huge difference in our world posts. I enjoy reading those but let me tell you there are some very real life changing days happening down here in the trenches with my littles...however they aren't pretty, and ninety percent of the time not what you would consider facebook worthy. SOOO I had a "brilliant" idea. lets make these real life trench moments facebook worthy, and better yet lets name this #tct #trueconfessionstuesday I set out the challenge and within and hour I had some pretty epic facebook worthy stuff going down in the playroom. Well lets just say I haven't had a short supply of these moments in the last few weeks. Just one of those seasons we go through in parenting. Man oh man today was bigger than facebook worthy it made it all the way to blog-worthy...today started like any other Tuesday, both boys woke up early and were in pretty good moods, so I decided that I would shower before bible study, since we were ahead of schedule I figured this was a fairly "safe" decision. not only was I wrong about this but this day started spiraling and fast. C came in crying because J hit him...you know the drill, so we keep trucking forward everyone keeps getting ready and I'm throwing the boys lunches together when I see something suspicious happening in the playroom...I knew they were up to something but I didn't want to know at all I wanted to just turn and run because its never ever a good sign when they are hiding behind those curtains in the playroom...
Chocolate syrup...so much chocolate syrup
all over the window frame and on the carpet...now we aren't on time at all and things just got complicated. deep breath. don't over react. don't yell. don't yell. breathe. I cleaned it up as best I could temporarily and tried to figure out how to handle their consequence. talked with my mommy friends, and my hubs. Tried to remain positive about how the rest of the day will turn out.
haha it got worse...
to spare you all the details, I had to go buy some more hand soap, and we had to clean up their bedroom...the best words I heard all day were when my hubs got home and told me he would make dinner while I went to run errands to restock everything that was emptied during our boys undoing today....
mommy time...quiet...just me, music and my Jesus...peace
You see life happens and you notice it more when you are looking for opportunities to share. Just like you start noticing all the cars that are just like yours once you buy a new one?! So life happens, I wanted to be a better mom this year, to stop yelling, to use other ways to discipline my boys, better ways to be their mom. I've had plenty of opportunities to use the new resources, and even more reasons to delve deeper into them. Lots of reasons to rely on Jesus more everyday. To lean on the holy spirit who knows my boys inmost being and he knows exactly what they need and when. He also knows what this mommy needs. I need those genuine relationships where we can talk about crappy days and lift each other up, encourage one another and stand together and fight for our kiddos.
I'm reminded about the love Jesus has for me and the grace that so abounds in his love for me. He is ever patient with me, when I over react, when I yell and when I make bad choices. I get to offer that same grace and love to my boys. I was reminded today that no matter what these boys do, there is absolutely nothing they can do that can make me love them any less. How much truer is that about Jesus' love for us??
So today even though I felt like I was drowning, I could keep my eyes above the ways, I could fix my eyes on Jesus and lean on the fact that in him there is nothing I cant handle, on my own I crash and burn quite fast.
As I pulled into the drive way Hillsongs' Oceans (Where feet may fail) came on. man that song speaks to my heart.
Peace be with you...I'm praying for you. You got this. If God brings you to it he will bring you through it as long as you keep your eyes on him. Don't forget to look up above the waves, to the one who can plant your feet firmly on top of the water.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1m_sWJQm2fs
Chocolate syrup...so much chocolate syrup
all over the window frame and on the carpet...now we aren't on time at all and things just got complicated. deep breath. don't over react. don't yell. don't yell. breathe. I cleaned it up as best I could temporarily and tried to figure out how to handle their consequence. talked with my mommy friends, and my hubs. Tried to remain positive about how the rest of the day will turn out.
haha it got worse...
to spare you all the details, I had to go buy some more hand soap, and we had to clean up their bedroom...the best words I heard all day were when my hubs got home and told me he would make dinner while I went to run errands to restock everything that was emptied during our boys undoing today....
mommy time...quiet...just me, music and my Jesus...peace
You see life happens and you notice it more when you are looking for opportunities to share. Just like you start noticing all the cars that are just like yours once you buy a new one?! So life happens, I wanted to be a better mom this year, to stop yelling, to use other ways to discipline my boys, better ways to be their mom. I've had plenty of opportunities to use the new resources, and even more reasons to delve deeper into them. Lots of reasons to rely on Jesus more everyday. To lean on the holy spirit who knows my boys inmost being and he knows exactly what they need and when. He also knows what this mommy needs. I need those genuine relationships where we can talk about crappy days and lift each other up, encourage one another and stand together and fight for our kiddos.
I'm reminded about the love Jesus has for me and the grace that so abounds in his love for me. He is ever patient with me, when I over react, when I yell and when I make bad choices. I get to offer that same grace and love to my boys. I was reminded today that no matter what these boys do, there is absolutely nothing they can do that can make me love them any less. How much truer is that about Jesus' love for us??
So today even though I felt like I was drowning, I could keep my eyes above the ways, I could fix my eyes on Jesus and lean on the fact that in him there is nothing I cant handle, on my own I crash and burn quite fast.
As I pulled into the drive way Hillsongs' Oceans (Where feet may fail) came on. man that song speaks to my heart.
Peace be with you...I'm praying for you. You got this. If God brings you to it he will bring you through it as long as you keep your eyes on him. Don't forget to look up above the waves, to the one who can plant your feet firmly on top of the water.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1m_sWJQm2fs
Wednesday, January 14, 2015
Fail...or so i thought
As many of you may know I'm optimistic to a fault...almost ninety percent of the time. The other ten percent is evened out by my equally optimistic husband. Except you see you when I'm running apparently. Every negative thought comes into my brain, all the negative self talk that I've worked for years to overcome, comes flowing back. I doubt myself and man oh man I complain...I feel really bad for my run buddy. It really is thanks to her I'm actually running at all, because another thing most people know about me is that my husband runs and not me...well apparently we are both runners. I'm just as surprised as you are right now.
We took it slow getting into running. She didn't think she could do it and I knew if it was something she wanted to do, that she could do it...no doubt. I knew I would have to follow a plan or I'd end up on the sideline after 3 days of running. So we found a plan and started...slowly but surely, starting with intervals working up through the longer intervals to where we are today. Yesterday we ran for 30 minutes and it felt great. However, let me back up to the reason I actually set down to write this...after all the title is "fail" and that is obviously not where we are right now.
So we had been doing really good, following plan, running 3 days a week, rain, cold or warm, even thanksgiving day we ran...Then came Christmas travels and all the busyness that comes with the holiday season. So I missed some runs, I tried to run and due to a cold ended up only running for 10 mins...so by the time we got home and were able to run our 30 min runs seemed like an eternity and every part of my body ached and I regretted the day I agreed to run...all that self doubt and negative self talk came back with a vengeance for about 2 weeks...it was awful I couldn't figure out what had changed, the best part?! Just when I didn't think it could get any worse...I tanked I was congested, I probably shouldn't haven been running but I couldn't miss another one, so there I was 10-15 mins in and my body decides it cant go any further. I cant breathe all the stuff that is keeping me congested wont move, so I stop, I was so frustrated but she graciously stopped running with me and we walked and talked, about Jesus, about what God was doing in our lives, about what God was teaching us...after about half a mile I felt better and we finished...but I felt defeated. How can it go from such a good place to me not even feeling like I could finish?? I left that run with a big red F ... I just couldn't understand ... I sulked but moved on no use in dwelling.... right??
Reluctantly we got back out there I mean we do have a race coming up so we have to keep going, plus she is counting on me...accountability can be such a pain sometimes but man its necessary. We started our run and it wasn't feeling too bad but my shin was bothering me and I was just begging God to not let it develop into shin splints...then my knee...then my hip...cue doubt and sulking...but I tried to keep quiet, no need to be negative and share that...As we were running she asked about our bible study that we had just started that morning. I gave her a "quick" synopsis in between breaths and we slowed our pace a little so I wasn't gasping for air between sentences. I noticed a change in our run, in how I was feeling, in the ease of the run. We weren't focusing inward, we shifted it off the doubt and turned it on Jesus. I tell you what, Jesus met us and even though we had to make a pit stop it felt effortless to start up again to keep going.
I lost my focus...I let my sight be set on me and my petty issues instead of the transformation that can come from the deep Jesus moments you can have with a friend on a run. Jesus...oh our sweet sweet Jesus just meets us where we are and joins us. He helps us see how trivial these annoyances are and how we can overcome. You see I am an overcomer, a conqueror, a co-heir with Jesus, I'm a daughter, fully loved and fully forgiven. Those things are true. Thank you Jesus for reminding me that all I really want and need is you.
Failure isn't at all what it seems most of the time, but what failure can do is suffocate if we let it. Don't ever let anyone tell you, that you are a failure, that there is no hope for redemption or a future and that you should quit because that isn't truth. Its only a true fail, if we fail to see Jesus, if we stay there in the failure. Look up and out. Jesus is so much bigger than the circumstances you see yourself in.
We took it slow getting into running. She didn't think she could do it and I knew if it was something she wanted to do, that she could do it...no doubt. I knew I would have to follow a plan or I'd end up on the sideline after 3 days of running. So we found a plan and started...slowly but surely, starting with intervals working up through the longer intervals to where we are today. Yesterday we ran for 30 minutes and it felt great. However, let me back up to the reason I actually set down to write this...after all the title is "fail" and that is obviously not where we are right now.
So we had been doing really good, following plan, running 3 days a week, rain, cold or warm, even thanksgiving day we ran...Then came Christmas travels and all the busyness that comes with the holiday season. So I missed some runs, I tried to run and due to a cold ended up only running for 10 mins...so by the time we got home and were able to run our 30 min runs seemed like an eternity and every part of my body ached and I regretted the day I agreed to run...all that self doubt and negative self talk came back with a vengeance for about 2 weeks...it was awful I couldn't figure out what had changed, the best part?! Just when I didn't think it could get any worse...I tanked I was congested, I probably shouldn't haven been running but I couldn't miss another one, so there I was 10-15 mins in and my body decides it cant go any further. I cant breathe all the stuff that is keeping me congested wont move, so I stop, I was so frustrated but she graciously stopped running with me and we walked and talked, about Jesus, about what God was doing in our lives, about what God was teaching us...after about half a mile I felt better and we finished...but I felt defeated. How can it go from such a good place to me not even feeling like I could finish?? I left that run with a big red F ... I just couldn't understand ... I sulked but moved on no use in dwelling.... right??
Reluctantly we got back out there I mean we do have a race coming up so we have to keep going, plus she is counting on me...accountability can be such a pain sometimes but man its necessary. We started our run and it wasn't feeling too bad but my shin was bothering me and I was just begging God to not let it develop into shin splints...then my knee...then my hip...cue doubt and sulking...but I tried to keep quiet, no need to be negative and share that...As we were running she asked about our bible study that we had just started that morning. I gave her a "quick" synopsis in between breaths and we slowed our pace a little so I wasn't gasping for air between sentences. I noticed a change in our run, in how I was feeling, in the ease of the run. We weren't focusing inward, we shifted it off the doubt and turned it on Jesus. I tell you what, Jesus met us and even though we had to make a pit stop it felt effortless to start up again to keep going.
I lost my focus...I let my sight be set on me and my petty issues instead of the transformation that can come from the deep Jesus moments you can have with a friend on a run. Jesus...oh our sweet sweet Jesus just meets us where we are and joins us. He helps us see how trivial these annoyances are and how we can overcome. You see I am an overcomer, a conqueror, a co-heir with Jesus, I'm a daughter, fully loved and fully forgiven. Those things are true. Thank you Jesus for reminding me that all I really want and need is you.
Failure isn't at all what it seems most of the time, but what failure can do is suffocate if we let it. Don't ever let anyone tell you, that you are a failure, that there is no hope for redemption or a future and that you should quit because that isn't truth. Its only a true fail, if we fail to see Jesus, if we stay there in the failure. Look up and out. Jesus is so much bigger than the circumstances you see yourself in.
Saturday, January 10, 2015
Happy New Year
Its a new year...so much to look forward to. One of my favorite parts of the end of a year and the beginning of a new year is looking back on the year that just ended to see what I can do better, improve on, or continue doing. Self reflection always helps you grow, the hard part is discerning which habits are worth keeping and which ones need to go. Usually we get caught up in resolutions, twenty things we are going to change and how to be better. I don't know about you but these resolutions don't stick around long because they are me powered, they are angela will powered...haha that doesn't go near as far as it needs to most of the time.
So we pray through these resolutions, these changes we feel need to take place to help us be better. One morning, it was New Years Day, I saw a friend post on facebook, how her daughter asked her what her new years revolutions were. Revolution...she said she laughed...but then she got to thinking and praying about what that revolution would be and what it would look like. she said it looks like Jesus, Jesus revolutionizing us, our hearts, our lives, our habits, our relationships. Seeking God first, seeking his priorities, his will for us. Those things, those resolutions or revolutions will stick, those will transform lives. Those will make the biggest difference and make us the best us possible. Revolutions...this facebook post stayed with me...as most of hers do. You really should follow Jackie Hooks on Facebook. Its so inspiring how she loves Jesus, because Jesus is big, much bigger than we often give him credit for. Each day as I have been pursuing what God has in store for this year that has stuck with me.
The great thing about life is its ever changing, even if you are at a place you want to change just give it time it will, the crazy thing about the change is most of the time it isn't necessarily what you want it to be. The only way to ensure that it is the change you want, initiate it, pursue it, and get comfortable in the midst of it, pray through it, lean in and push forward. In the last seven years that's what I've learned about change, resolutions. I know that God has big adventures ahead for us this year and the years to come. As I was thinking on these things and talking with friends about what we can do to be better mommas for our kids, and just to be better. The struggle is real and intense most days especially when your in the trenches just praying you're making the right choices and making a difference in your children's lives.
The thing we all struggled with was comparing ourselves to others. You know, you have those friends who are throwing pintrest parties, having facebook worthy posts about their family life every day, hitting the mark, potty trained in 24 hours, and their kids are already world changers for Jesus...my realization it doesn't matter what I see on facebook I know their reality is like mine...despite what it looks like on this side of the screen, because nobodies life is perfect. Nobody gets it right one hundred percent of the time. No matter what they are doing, no matter what size of the impact they are making, they are just as human as we are.
Lightbulb...
we cannot spend time comparing our journey to someone elses...we aren't on the same road, God has a different plan for each of us. It is a waste of time for me to sit around think about how I'm not measuring up to what God has called someone else to. Pray and seek the plan that God has for you, stay focused on that, help each other stay focused on their specific goals, lets strive together forward, looking to God and leaning on his will and direction.
My new years, my goals is to press into Jesus, seek him, let him revolutionize the little things so that the big things fall into place. Focus on my journey, pray for my friends on their journey and the great thing?? while we are focusing forward together we get to lean on each other and turn each other to Jesus when we are spinning our wheels.
Don't run on your power seek the unending power, the one that can help you change your world and conquer all that he has called you to this year and all the years to come! He's got some pretty great things in store for all of us!!
Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith.
Hebrews 12:1-2
until we meet again...
So we pray through these resolutions, these changes we feel need to take place to help us be better. One morning, it was New Years Day, I saw a friend post on facebook, how her daughter asked her what her new years revolutions were. Revolution...she said she laughed...but then she got to thinking and praying about what that revolution would be and what it would look like. she said it looks like Jesus, Jesus revolutionizing us, our hearts, our lives, our habits, our relationships. Seeking God first, seeking his priorities, his will for us. Those things, those resolutions or revolutions will stick, those will transform lives. Those will make the biggest difference and make us the best us possible. Revolutions...this facebook post stayed with me...as most of hers do. You really should follow Jackie Hooks on Facebook. Its so inspiring how she loves Jesus, because Jesus is big, much bigger than we often give him credit for. Each day as I have been pursuing what God has in store for this year that has stuck with me.
The great thing about life is its ever changing, even if you are at a place you want to change just give it time it will, the crazy thing about the change is most of the time it isn't necessarily what you want it to be. The only way to ensure that it is the change you want, initiate it, pursue it, and get comfortable in the midst of it, pray through it, lean in and push forward. In the last seven years that's what I've learned about change, resolutions. I know that God has big adventures ahead for us this year and the years to come. As I was thinking on these things and talking with friends about what we can do to be better mommas for our kids, and just to be better. The struggle is real and intense most days especially when your in the trenches just praying you're making the right choices and making a difference in your children's lives.
The thing we all struggled with was comparing ourselves to others. You know, you have those friends who are throwing pintrest parties, having facebook worthy posts about their family life every day, hitting the mark, potty trained in 24 hours, and their kids are already world changers for Jesus...my realization it doesn't matter what I see on facebook I know their reality is like mine...despite what it looks like on this side of the screen, because nobodies life is perfect. Nobody gets it right one hundred percent of the time. No matter what they are doing, no matter what size of the impact they are making, they are just as human as we are.
Lightbulb...
we cannot spend time comparing our journey to someone elses...we aren't on the same road, God has a different plan for each of us. It is a waste of time for me to sit around think about how I'm not measuring up to what God has called someone else to. Pray and seek the plan that God has for you, stay focused on that, help each other stay focused on their specific goals, lets strive together forward, looking to God and leaning on his will and direction.
My new years, my goals is to press into Jesus, seek him, let him revolutionize the little things so that the big things fall into place. Focus on my journey, pray for my friends on their journey and the great thing?? while we are focusing forward together we get to lean on each other and turn each other to Jesus when we are spinning our wheels.
Don't run on your power seek the unending power, the one that can help you change your world and conquer all that he has called you to this year and all the years to come! He's got some pretty great things in store for all of us!!
Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith.
Hebrews 12:1-2
until we meet again...
Monday, December 15, 2014
Seven Years
so this is the second round of this blog post....not by choice but I never learned that once you loose a blog because it didn't save that you should type it some place else because it froze while I was trying to upload to pictures and its still not working...I'm still not I'm still typing this on blogger...its just easier. oh well. It is amazing how much life has changed over the last seven years. Seven years ago today was a Saturday and the hubs and I were newly weds, not even 24 hours married, we were preparing to move from Missouri to Colorado, preparing to start new jobs and I was getting ready to start the spring semester of my sophomore year at Colorado Christian University. We went shopping for Christmas stuff. We were outcasts in some ways but welcomed with Love in others. On December 14, 2007 I married my best friend, I loved him so much the incredible thing on that day seven years ago I never would have believed I could love him any more and as cliché as it sounds I love him so much more today than I did then and not because life has been sunshine and roses.
Life has been full of tough spots/valleys but also mountain tops, some days are choc full of both. Over the last seven years we have moved five times, two of those moves were within a year of each other with a 1.5 year old and pregnant with our second little boy, the last move was to where we are now with J 20 months old and C just 2 weeks old. We started in Colorado with no friends, in an awesome 1 bedroom apartment we found online in beautiful Lakewood Colorado. I couldn't imagine our first 5 years anywhere but Colorado, we had such an amazing adventure there, we found some life long friends and great experiences. I mean that's where both of our little boys were born, we can tell everyday that they are true Colorado natives because every morning they wake up in the winter they look for snow. Too bad they are growing up in Texas where snow is sparse at best most winters.
The biggest blessing in the last two years was our church First Baptist Arlington, to say its unexpected would be an understatement, we drug our feet when it came to visiting, we actually visited out of obligation...but God knew after that visit there would be no turning back for us. We knew people going in because most of our neighbors go to FBCA, so they encouraged us to find a sunday school class, and boy have we enjoyed that nudge too...We have made lifelong friends in that class, in a lot of ways its our Acts 2 church. I love living life with our friends, to know that there is always someone who has your back and can help.
It's an example of how our marriage has worked so well, we are able to both work together, to lean in on each others strengths and just help fill needs as needs come up. Building up each other, its so cool to see when we are working together because things just happen. I'm so thankful for my hubs who helps me out in so many ways, in all the ways he is blessed.
This year has been...in one word...raw, real, unexpected. ok maybe three. You see a year ago I would have never thought we would be having Upma, a traditional breakfast for India, for breakfast and almost daily talks about India and what God is doing there, I never would have thought that India would be on our minds and hearts. This past year has greatly impacted our worldview as a family in an incredibly humbling way, I think the reason words have been harder over the last few months since India is because its hard to say how much something has impacted your soul. There are no word to fully describe the way raw life its you right smack dab in the middle of our abundantly distracted American lives. Words are hard because my brain is tired, overwhelmed and surrounded by mommy stuff. Words are hard because life isn't just clear cut, its not sunshine and roses, its not as great as our governments portray, its not about Santa and being good to acquire gifts that we will get rid of within the next year. Words are hard because our souls, brains and lives are trying to communicate the supernatural and abundance that is God, how do you put that into words?? I don't think you can...I think that's why our actions are important, and why are hearts break out into tears because words just cant fully encapsulate what our hearts long to say. India has hit us, it has shown us where God's heart lies and where he wants us to dwell, how he wants us to love and live. In so many ways we are processing all that India is and stands for in our lives and I'm grateful for that especially this Christmas that make us thankful for the things we have like healthy boys and our amazing seven years of marriage. Those are the things we are blessed with abundantly.
Wow how life has changed in seven years....I'm grateful for every change, every valley and every mountain top. For the anniversaries spent at dinner, bed and breakfasts, a cruise, a small cottage in Stockton Missouri, one in downtown Dallas as the hubs prepared for his 6th marathon pacing our friend on her first marathon adventure with our two boys in the pouring rain. You can just never tell what that year will hold and man am I looking forward to so many more celebrations with the hubs no matter what that day may hold.
Life has been full of tough spots/valleys but also mountain tops, some days are choc full of both. Over the last seven years we have moved five times, two of those moves were within a year of each other with a 1.5 year old and pregnant with our second little boy, the last move was to where we are now with J 20 months old and C just 2 weeks old. We started in Colorado with no friends, in an awesome 1 bedroom apartment we found online in beautiful Lakewood Colorado. I couldn't imagine our first 5 years anywhere but Colorado, we had such an amazing adventure there, we found some life long friends and great experiences. I mean that's where both of our little boys were born, we can tell everyday that they are true Colorado natives because every morning they wake up in the winter they look for snow. Too bad they are growing up in Texas where snow is sparse at best most winters.
The biggest blessing in the last two years was our church First Baptist Arlington, to say its unexpected would be an understatement, we drug our feet when it came to visiting, we actually visited out of obligation...but God knew after that visit there would be no turning back for us. We knew people going in because most of our neighbors go to FBCA, so they encouraged us to find a sunday school class, and boy have we enjoyed that nudge too...We have made lifelong friends in that class, in a lot of ways its our Acts 2 church. I love living life with our friends, to know that there is always someone who has your back and can help.
It's an example of how our marriage has worked so well, we are able to both work together, to lean in on each others strengths and just help fill needs as needs come up. Building up each other, its so cool to see when we are working together because things just happen. I'm so thankful for my hubs who helps me out in so many ways, in all the ways he is blessed.
This year has been...in one word...raw, real, unexpected. ok maybe three. You see a year ago I would have never thought we would be having Upma, a traditional breakfast for India, for breakfast and almost daily talks about India and what God is doing there, I never would have thought that India would be on our minds and hearts. This past year has greatly impacted our worldview as a family in an incredibly humbling way, I think the reason words have been harder over the last few months since India is because its hard to say how much something has impacted your soul. There are no word to fully describe the way raw life its you right smack dab in the middle of our abundantly distracted American lives. Words are hard because my brain is tired, overwhelmed and surrounded by mommy stuff. Words are hard because life isn't just clear cut, its not sunshine and roses, its not as great as our governments portray, its not about Santa and being good to acquire gifts that we will get rid of within the next year. Words are hard because our souls, brains and lives are trying to communicate the supernatural and abundance that is God, how do you put that into words?? I don't think you can...I think that's why our actions are important, and why are hearts break out into tears because words just cant fully encapsulate what our hearts long to say. India has hit us, it has shown us where God's heart lies and where he wants us to dwell, how he wants us to love and live. In so many ways we are processing all that India is and stands for in our lives and I'm grateful for that especially this Christmas that make us thankful for the things we have like healthy boys and our amazing seven years of marriage. Those are the things we are blessed with abundantly.
Wow how life has changed in seven years....I'm grateful for every change, every valley and every mountain top. For the anniversaries spent at dinner, bed and breakfasts, a cruise, a small cottage in Stockton Missouri, one in downtown Dallas as the hubs prepared for his 6th marathon pacing our friend on her first marathon adventure with our two boys in the pouring rain. You can just never tell what that year will hold and man am I looking forward to so many more celebrations with the hubs no matter what that day may hold.
Wednesday, November 26, 2014
Grateful
Since the hubs has been home from India, life has been a whirlwind. It's hard to believe it has been four weeks, and not only has it been four weeks but its Thanksgiving. This year has flown by and has been such an unexpected adventure. God has really opened our lives up to the awareness of how abundant our lives are. It has been very humbling, I have so much to be grateful for it is ridiculous. I have at my fingertips so much more than the majority of the world. The struggle...what am I doing with these resources to change my world? What can I do to make a difference and what have I been called to do? I don't know all the details quite yet but I know the beauty is in the details and in discovering what lies ahead and embracing the journey as we figure it out.
Today I'm grateful. I'm grateful for growing up in the United States, I'm grateful for the opportunity to attend a free public school, for the ability to be able to become a follower of Jesus at the young age of 10 and be accepted by my family and have the safety of freedom of religion. I'm grateful for my college education, and all the friends I met through that awesome experience. I'm grateful for our home, our cars, the electricity and gas that keep us warm, and allow us to cook. I'm grateful for our clean water. I'm grateful for my family, I'm so honored to be married to such an incredible and Godly man who, seeks God daily, who goes out of his way to serve his family. I'm so very thankful for the company that he works for, that he enjoys going to work and loves what he does. I'm thankful that his job allows me to stay home and care for our two amazing boys and it allows me to serve my family in that way. I LOVE my job, I love my family and I love that I can serve them love them and also be an entrepreneur. I'm thankful for our friends and family, those wonderful people that God has blessed us with to walk our life journey with. You make this walk a lot less lonely and you are super encouraging, and you get it.
We have so many awesome opportunities here. I have two of the most precious gifts I could ever ask for and I'm honored to have a part in raising these future world changers. I pray for them daily. I pray that I'm showing them that they aren't entitled, that God has created us to work, and work hard, to find our passions and use them and how to be good stewards. I pray that I show them how to love and love deeply.
I'm so grateful and a grateful heart is content. God help me be more grateful, help me be content, help me pass that on.
Ephesians 3:14-21New International Version (NIV)
20 Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, 21 to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.
Philippians 4:5-7New International Version (NIV)
5 Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. 6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Today I'm grateful. I'm grateful for growing up in the United States, I'm grateful for the opportunity to attend a free public school, for the ability to be able to become a follower of Jesus at the young age of 10 and be accepted by my family and have the safety of freedom of religion. I'm grateful for my college education, and all the friends I met through that awesome experience. I'm grateful for our home, our cars, the electricity and gas that keep us warm, and allow us to cook. I'm grateful for our clean water. I'm grateful for my family, I'm so honored to be married to such an incredible and Godly man who, seeks God daily, who goes out of his way to serve his family. I'm so very thankful for the company that he works for, that he enjoys going to work and loves what he does. I'm thankful that his job allows me to stay home and care for our two amazing boys and it allows me to serve my family in that way. I LOVE my job, I love my family and I love that I can serve them love them and also be an entrepreneur. I'm thankful for our friends and family, those wonderful people that God has blessed us with to walk our life journey with. You make this walk a lot less lonely and you are super encouraging, and you get it.
We have so many awesome opportunities here. I have two of the most precious gifts I could ever ask for and I'm honored to have a part in raising these future world changers. I pray for them daily. I pray that I'm showing them that they aren't entitled, that God has created us to work, and work hard, to find our passions and use them and how to be good stewards. I pray that I show them how to love and love deeply.
I'm so grateful and a grateful heart is content. God help me be more grateful, help me be content, help me pass that on.
Ephesians 3:14-21New International Version (NIV)
A Prayer for the Ephesians
14 For this reason I kneel before the Father, 15 from whom every family[a] in heaven and on earth derives its name. 16 I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, 17 so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, 18 may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, 19 and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.20 Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, 21 to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.
Philippians 4:5-7New International Version (NIV)
5 Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. 6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Tuesday, November 18, 2014
Contentment
Happy Fall friends! Hope you are all staying warm. I think it is pretty ironic that during this season of over indulgence, of giving to top what you gave last year, trying to keep up with the people who "have it all" that I have seen at least a dozen articles about, Teaching your child contentment", "How to raise a grateful child"...
Since before Halloween was even over we saw evidence of Christmas coming. Lights for sale at target and all the red and green coming out at various other stores all in preparation for the millions of dollars that are about to come in over the next 2 months. I get all the "reasons" why...but seriously? unnecessary...because get this we all know that Christmas is coming. I mean how could we forget? You see taking our kids and serving with them is amazing. Telling them about the boys and girls in India and even here in Arlington that live in the various shelters that don't have the luxuries they have available at their fingertips is certainly a great start and even exposing them to these peers is awesome. BUT its so much more than doing those things during November and December to help us feel better about spending thousands of dollars on each other because we are supposed to...necessity and guilt shouldn't drive us to serve or give.
Thanksgiving and Christmas are so much more than the gifts, than the things we can acquire. Its about the moments, the memories, celebrating and enjoying our families and friends Ever since India there has been a pivotal change in our family, I love shopping as much as the next person and retail therapy with some chocolate...yes please...but its so hard to think about shopping when there are little boys and girls who don't have the basic necessities let alone their wants.
A few weeks ago after the boys had been spending way too much time fighting over their toys we packed them all up and took them away. They have since earned a few back based on good behavior and not fighting over them any more. However, there was something that happened when they didn't have anything to fight over. They played with their books, each other, they shared and used their imaginations. They now play with blocks and build things.
Epiphany
total palm to forehead moment
Our boys...just like us...merely have way too many options...
One thing I've heard over and over from my friends and husband who have gone to India was the joy these children had, despite what they lacked in our western culture standard. How come I cant live maybe a week without coming up with something else I "need." We are surrounded by advertisements and marketers telling us from every angle that we need more and more importantly we deserve more. Another thing my hubby has come back with a fire to fix is to build a new orphanage for some boys that are living there. The kicker...the home they need built, is 2000 sq ft, and it will cost them$40,000 to build it, the well for clean water, sewer and electric. Here is some perspective...there will be 14 boys that move into this home and it will home several more as needed, and they will build up. Our home is over 2000 sq ft and we have 4 people living in it. *Mind Blown* and how self serving can I be? here I live in a home that is considered modest to some, a mansion to others. Its warm, clean (well for the most part), clean water, food lots and lots of food, and stuff. It is really hard to sit in my home with more than most of the world could dream of and think about going out and buying more stuff to celebrate the birth of our savior....
Christmas isn't sitting the same as it has in the past and I'm thankful for that. I don't want to be status quo, I don't want to be normal and I don't to raise our boys to be ungrateful or entitled, I want to raise them to be mighty warriors, with a passion to change the world and make it better. I'm really looking forward to celebrating Thanksgiving and just being with my family and being grateful for the abundance that we are blessed with. May it be used and transformed as God's will may have it. May we see the ways we can use these blessings of abundance to impact the world around us. Help us be good stewards. Help us teach our boys to be content by us first being content...
This is something we are working through, praying through, its new and I challenge you to join us.
Philippians 4:10-12
Thanks for Their Gifts
I rejoiced greatly in the Lord that at last you renewed your concern for me. indeed, you were concerned, but you had no opportunity to show it. I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty, I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or want.
1 Timothy 6
All who are under the yoke of slavery should consider their masters worthy of full respect, so that God's name and our teaching may not be slandered. Those who have believing masters should not show them disrespect just because they are fellow believers. Instead, they should serve them even better because their masters are dear to them as fellow believers and are devoted to the welfare of their slaves.
These are the things you are to teach and insist on. If anyone teaches otherwise and does not agree to the sound instruction of our Lord Jesus Christ and to godly teaching, they are conceited and understand nothing. They have an unhealthy interest in controversies and quarrels about words that result in envy, strife, malicious talk, evil suspicions and constant friction between people of corrupt mind, who have been robbed of the truth and who think that godliness is a means to financial gain.
But godliness with contentment is a great gain. For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it. But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that. Those who want to get rich fall into temptation and a trap and into many foolish and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many greifs.
But you, man of God, flee from all of this, and pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, endurance and gentleness. Fight the good fight of the faith. Take hold of the eternal life to which you were called when you made your good confession in the presence of many witnesses. In the sight of God, who gives life to everything, and of Christ Jesus, who while testifying before Pontius Pilate made the good confession, I charge you to keep this command without spot or blame until the appearing of our Lord Jesus Christ, which God will bring about in his own time -- God, the blessed and only Ruler, the King of kings and Lord of lords, who alone is immortal and who lives in unapproachable light, who no one has seen or can see. To him be honor and might forever.
Amen
Command those who are rich in this present world not to arrogant nor to put their hope in wealth, which is so uncertain, but to put their hope in God, who richly provides us with everything for our enjoyment. Command them to do good, to be rich in good deeds, and to be generous and willing to share. In this way they will lay up treasure for themselves as a firm foundation for the coming age, so that they may take hold of the life that is truly life.
Timothy, guard what has been entrusted to your care. Turn away from godless chatter and the opposing ideas of what is falsely called knowledge, which some have professed and in so doing have departed from the faith.
Grace be with you all
until we meet again!
Since before Halloween was even over we saw evidence of Christmas coming. Lights for sale at target and all the red and green coming out at various other stores all in preparation for the millions of dollars that are about to come in over the next 2 months. I get all the "reasons" why...but seriously? unnecessary...because get this we all know that Christmas is coming. I mean how could we forget? You see taking our kids and serving with them is amazing. Telling them about the boys and girls in India and even here in Arlington that live in the various shelters that don't have the luxuries they have available at their fingertips is certainly a great start and even exposing them to these peers is awesome. BUT its so much more than doing those things during November and December to help us feel better about spending thousands of dollars on each other because we are supposed to...necessity and guilt shouldn't drive us to serve or give.
Thanksgiving and Christmas are so much more than the gifts, than the things we can acquire. Its about the moments, the memories, celebrating and enjoying our families and friends Ever since India there has been a pivotal change in our family, I love shopping as much as the next person and retail therapy with some chocolate...yes please...but its so hard to think about shopping when there are little boys and girls who don't have the basic necessities let alone their wants.
A few weeks ago after the boys had been spending way too much time fighting over their toys we packed them all up and took them away. They have since earned a few back based on good behavior and not fighting over them any more. However, there was something that happened when they didn't have anything to fight over. They played with their books, each other, they shared and used their imaginations. They now play with blocks and build things.
Epiphany
total palm to forehead moment
Our boys...just like us...merely have way too many options...
One thing I've heard over and over from my friends and husband who have gone to India was the joy these children had, despite what they lacked in our western culture standard. How come I cant live maybe a week without coming up with something else I "need." We are surrounded by advertisements and marketers telling us from every angle that we need more and more importantly we deserve more. Another thing my hubby has come back with a fire to fix is to build a new orphanage for some boys that are living there. The kicker...the home they need built, is 2000 sq ft, and it will cost them$40,000 to build it, the well for clean water, sewer and electric. Here is some perspective...there will be 14 boys that move into this home and it will home several more as needed, and they will build up. Our home is over 2000 sq ft and we have 4 people living in it. *Mind Blown* and how self serving can I be? here I live in a home that is considered modest to some, a mansion to others. Its warm, clean (well for the most part), clean water, food lots and lots of food, and stuff. It is really hard to sit in my home with more than most of the world could dream of and think about going out and buying more stuff to celebrate the birth of our savior....
Christmas isn't sitting the same as it has in the past and I'm thankful for that. I don't want to be status quo, I don't want to be normal and I don't to raise our boys to be ungrateful or entitled, I want to raise them to be mighty warriors, with a passion to change the world and make it better. I'm really looking forward to celebrating Thanksgiving and just being with my family and being grateful for the abundance that we are blessed with. May it be used and transformed as God's will may have it. May we see the ways we can use these blessings of abundance to impact the world around us. Help us be good stewards. Help us teach our boys to be content by us first being content...
This is something we are working through, praying through, its new and I challenge you to join us.
Philippians 4:10-12
Thanks for Their Gifts
I rejoiced greatly in the Lord that at last you renewed your concern for me. indeed, you were concerned, but you had no opportunity to show it. I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty, I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or want.
1 Timothy 6
All who are under the yoke of slavery should consider their masters worthy of full respect, so that God's name and our teaching may not be slandered. Those who have believing masters should not show them disrespect just because they are fellow believers. Instead, they should serve them even better because their masters are dear to them as fellow believers and are devoted to the welfare of their slaves.
These are the things you are to teach and insist on. If anyone teaches otherwise and does not agree to the sound instruction of our Lord Jesus Christ and to godly teaching, they are conceited and understand nothing. They have an unhealthy interest in controversies and quarrels about words that result in envy, strife, malicious talk, evil suspicions and constant friction between people of corrupt mind, who have been robbed of the truth and who think that godliness is a means to financial gain.
But godliness with contentment is a great gain. For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it. But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that. Those who want to get rich fall into temptation and a trap and into many foolish and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many greifs.
But you, man of God, flee from all of this, and pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, endurance and gentleness. Fight the good fight of the faith. Take hold of the eternal life to which you were called when you made your good confession in the presence of many witnesses. In the sight of God, who gives life to everything, and of Christ Jesus, who while testifying before Pontius Pilate made the good confession, I charge you to keep this command without spot or blame until the appearing of our Lord Jesus Christ, which God will bring about in his own time -- God, the blessed and only Ruler, the King of kings and Lord of lords, who alone is immortal and who lives in unapproachable light, who no one has seen or can see. To him be honor and might forever.
Amen
Command those who are rich in this present world not to arrogant nor to put their hope in wealth, which is so uncertain, but to put their hope in God, who richly provides us with everything for our enjoyment. Command them to do good, to be rich in good deeds, and to be generous and willing to share. In this way they will lay up treasure for themselves as a firm foundation for the coming age, so that they may take hold of the life that is truly life.
Timothy, guard what has been entrusted to your care. Turn away from godless chatter and the opposing ideas of what is falsely called knowledge, which some have professed and in so doing have departed from the faith.
Grace be with you all
until we meet again!
Friday, November 7, 2014
I forget so easily sometimes
Good Morning friends, hope your November is off to a great start. Ours has been a blur, in the busy crazy times when life is just moving forward while you are trying to process life, its hard to move forward at the pace of the world around you. In some ways it feels like the hubs mission trip was months ago, yet it was just two weeks, these last four weeks...one word wow.
I didn't know what to expect when he arrived back home Wednesday October 29, I was just excited to have my partner in crime home. I don't think either one of us thought it would take a week and a half to get on a similar place, to connect, to get back to our new normal.
Life gets crazy so fast and you often forget how fast it goes until you want it to slow down. This is where I so often and so easily loose sight of the one who is fighting for me. I get distracted, and the enemy is so good as deception. When the world is flying by and all you want is those long chats with your friends at the coffee shop, or in your homes for dinner, I feel alone, isolated, overwhelmed, and unwanted or worse un-necessary. I get there so fast. Although I'm surprised it didn't happen a lot faster...considering. Once I'm there man I get depressed and check out even more...and so often long before I realize it.
I can sense it happening, things don't feel right, but I feel stuck. This time... I felt like I just needed my man to fight for me to have enough energy to connect with me and pursue me, I just couldn't find the words, how can he do those things without me telling him I need that?? Why do I get HERE?? Its so frustrating...Then last night it hit me, I have a savior, my Jesus, that is constantly fighting for me, the greatest thing, he knows when I need it, I need to work on turning to him as soon as I feel that change.
Friends our Jesus is out there fighting constantly for us, dancing over us, and interceding for us. How amazing?? Sometimes he calls us to join him in battle, other times he just wants us prepared for battle to remember daily to fully put on our battle armor to guard our hearts and heads from enemy attacks. Be ready friends but most importantly NEVER EVER forget that he is fighting for you and one of the greatest things he's won, its already been determined, He is the over all victor. Stand strong, look forward in the darkness that comes on so fast with the deceit, and the loneliness, focus on the light, seek it out. Its always worth seeking out, there is only hope, peace, grace, mercy, joy and love there. Oh how sweet, and beautiful. Your prince, your big daddy God is fighting for you and he cant loose and your worth that battle. When He engaged in battle with the enemy He deemed all of us worth fighting for.
I didn't know what to expect when he arrived back home Wednesday October 29, I was just excited to have my partner in crime home. I don't think either one of us thought it would take a week and a half to get on a similar place, to connect, to get back to our new normal.
Life gets crazy so fast and you often forget how fast it goes until you want it to slow down. This is where I so often and so easily loose sight of the one who is fighting for me. I get distracted, and the enemy is so good as deception. When the world is flying by and all you want is those long chats with your friends at the coffee shop, or in your homes for dinner, I feel alone, isolated, overwhelmed, and unwanted or worse un-necessary. I get there so fast. Although I'm surprised it didn't happen a lot faster...considering. Once I'm there man I get depressed and check out even more...and so often long before I realize it.
I can sense it happening, things don't feel right, but I feel stuck. This time... I felt like I just needed my man to fight for me to have enough energy to connect with me and pursue me, I just couldn't find the words, how can he do those things without me telling him I need that?? Why do I get HERE?? Its so frustrating...Then last night it hit me, I have a savior, my Jesus, that is constantly fighting for me, the greatest thing, he knows when I need it, I need to work on turning to him as soon as I feel that change.
Friends our Jesus is out there fighting constantly for us, dancing over us, and interceding for us. How amazing?? Sometimes he calls us to join him in battle, other times he just wants us prepared for battle to remember daily to fully put on our battle armor to guard our hearts and heads from enemy attacks. Be ready friends but most importantly NEVER EVER forget that he is fighting for you and one of the greatest things he's won, its already been determined, He is the over all victor. Stand strong, look forward in the darkness that comes on so fast with the deceit, and the loneliness, focus on the light, seek it out. Its always worth seeking out, there is only hope, peace, grace, mercy, joy and love there. Oh how sweet, and beautiful. Your prince, your big daddy God is fighting for you and he cant loose and your worth that battle. When He engaged in battle with the enemy He deemed all of us worth fighting for.
Ephesians 6:10-13, The Message
God is strong and he wants you strong. So take everything the Master has set out for you, well-made weapons of the best materials. And put them to use so you will be able to stand up to everything the Devil throws your way. This is no afternoon athletic contest that we'll walk away from and forget about in a couple of hours. This is for keeps, a life-or-death fight to the finish against the Devil and all his angels. Be prepared. You're up against far more than you can handle on your own. Take all the help you can get, every weapon God has issued, so that when it's all over but the shouting you'll still be on your feet.
Deuteronomy 1:30, NIV
The Lord your God, who is going before you, will fight for you, as he did for you in Egypt before your very eyes
Deuteronomy 3:22, NIV
Do not be afraid of them; the Lord your God himself will fight for you
Deuteronomy 20:4 NIV
For the Lord your God is the one who goes with you to fight for you against your enemies to give you victory
Joshua 23:10
One of you routs a thousand, because the Lord your God fights for you, just as he promised
and here is an excerpt from my Beth Moore Children of the Day bible study...
He will never stop fighting for you. He takes every assault on you personally. He goes before you onto every battlefield. He fights for you even when you're fighting yourself. As hated as you are by Satan, you never go head-to-head with him. Jesus does. And Jesus never loses a fight.
I'm so very thankful for God's word, for his constant reminders of how he not only loves us but how he pursues us, fights for us because of his all surpassing never ending love. If you are struggling like I was seek God and seek others your not alone and you are more than worth the fight! Lots of love and prayers for you brothers and sisters!
*stories from India coming soon...still processing but God is doing great works and he has big plans for us and India and ways for us to help our brothers and sisters on the ground there!! Your prayers are so special and appreciated!! Thanks.
Tuesday, October 28, 2014
Headed home!
well that went by fast...in some ways...today the team is headed to the airport and will be home tomorrow morning. Pray for safe travels, pray for health, pray that this last part of their trip goes smoothly, customs can be a bear. We are so excited to have them back and hear all the amazing stories. Pray for the team as they process all the things they experienced and saw, pray for them as they prepare sto share this experience with everyone back here at home. Pray that they get rest and are able to acclimate back to life here smoothly, I know most of them have to go back to work on Thursday.
Thank you for your prayers and I look forward to sharing the God stories from this trip with you.
Blessings and love until we meet again!
Thank you for your prayers and I look forward to sharing the God stories from this trip with you.
Blessings and love until we meet again!
Wednesday, October 22, 2014
India Updates
Great News they made it and they are acclimating...well for the most part :) PRAISE they all made it there safely, and with their luggage!! "Today-Thursday", its currently Thursday morning around 8 am there now, is their first ministry day in an orphanage, they will be heading out in just a few short hours. To share the Light of the World with these precious people. Pray for rest and restoration. They are tired and they aren't adjusting well to the new sleep schedules. I'm thankful that I've been able to Skype with my hubs a couple of times over the last few days.
Today is their official Diwali holiday. Its no mistake that they are in Delhi for this holiday sharing the light of the world with the people of India during their festival of light?! How awesome. Continue to pray for sleep and for them to begin to adjust to the new schedules quickly and that God just give them strength and energy even when they are feeling depleted. Pray for guidance, the right words and boldness. That they are able to reach out in confidence and just love on these people that the Indian society deems as unworthy. That these Indian people will just sense and feel the love of God pouring out and over them...because after all they will know us by our love.
Prayers for the families at home for strength, rejuvenation, rest, peace, and energy. I just feel drained...I miss my hubs but I'm so excited for this incredible opportunity he has. Pray for health and continued health, that little ones will feel better, that tummy bugs will be healed and stop spreading. Praise and Thanks to God for supplying a village for us to raise our children in, for those who come around each of us to build up, encourage, and assist. For people who are able to share needs and have an abundance of prayers, and those to walk beside us.
So thankful for this journey, for all of you. Thank you for your continued prayers and support. I will share more as I know more. All of your prayers are so appreciated. Thanks friends, until we meet again :)
Today is their official Diwali holiday. Its no mistake that they are in Delhi for this holiday sharing the light of the world with the people of India during their festival of light?! How awesome. Continue to pray for sleep and for them to begin to adjust to the new schedules quickly and that God just give them strength and energy even when they are feeling depleted. Pray for guidance, the right words and boldness. That they are able to reach out in confidence and just love on these people that the Indian society deems as unworthy. That these Indian people will just sense and feel the love of God pouring out and over them...because after all they will know us by our love.
Prayers for the families at home for strength, rejuvenation, rest, peace, and energy. I just feel drained...I miss my hubs but I'm so excited for this incredible opportunity he has. Pray for health and continued health, that little ones will feel better, that tummy bugs will be healed and stop spreading. Praise and Thanks to God for supplying a village for us to raise our children in, for those who come around each of us to build up, encourage, and assist. For people who are able to share needs and have an abundance of prayers, and those to walk beside us.
So thankful for this journey, for all of you. Thank you for your continued prayers and support. I will share more as I know more. All of your prayers are so appreciated. Thanks friends, until we meet again :)
Monday, October 20, 2014
Today is the day off to India
It's hard to believe that just a few short months ago he was asked to join this mission trip and yet today is the day he's getting in the airplane. We are super excited for what God has in store for him and how God is going to use him and this amazing team in India. This is such a new season in our lives I'm not 100% sure how I am supposed to feel...this is probably why I am awake at 5 am...
The bags are packed with all we can think he will need over the next 10 days. The car is loaded and ready to go, but we are thankful for a few more hours of family time this morning because man we are going to miss him so very much.
I know there are lots of prayers being said this morning and throughout today for this team and all the beautiful people in India and on their flights that they will bump elbows with. We are praying today for smooth travels that God will pave their way, praying that when they arrive in Dubai tomorrow all their luggage will be there, that customs and security will go well. That they will all get rest, that jet lag will be minimal if at all as it could be brutal from such long flights, that they will be able to stretch their legs and won't feel too antsy. Pray also that everything works out for the leader of this trip to make it there by Friday, that everything will work out according to Gods will. That if for some reason he doesnt make it that those responsibilities will fall evenly, lightly over those that can and are willing to lead, let them have peace and know that God's got this and he will equip them accordingly.
Pray for the families as they say goodbye to their loved ones and either this morning before work or at the airport, pray for the transition for those with young children, that life can be just distracting enough but that God will burden our hearts accordingly to pray for them as they need it. Pray that all things work out to communicate with their loved ones because although it will be difficult for those on the home front it will also be difficult for those on mission. Praying for strength and peace for all, because we know that God has great and powerful things ahead for this team.
I'll do my best to update you this week about how the trip is going, give you a glimpse of the things God is doing through these workers, and how he is working here at home. I'll also update you on prayer requests :) thanks friends many many blessings to all of you. May you follow the nudging and calling that God lays upon your heart no matter how scary or uncertain, because there is some beautiful miracles and blessings that come from that faithfulness and obedience.
*sorry for any misspelled words or misplaced words typing this on a mobile device has proven to be challenging...and it is 5 am 😳😊
The bags are packed with all we can think he will need over the next 10 days. The car is loaded and ready to go, but we are thankful for a few more hours of family time this morning because man we are going to miss him so very much.
I know there are lots of prayers being said this morning and throughout today for this team and all the beautiful people in India and on their flights that they will bump elbows with. We are praying today for smooth travels that God will pave their way, praying that when they arrive in Dubai tomorrow all their luggage will be there, that customs and security will go well. That they will all get rest, that jet lag will be minimal if at all as it could be brutal from such long flights, that they will be able to stretch their legs and won't feel too antsy. Pray also that everything works out for the leader of this trip to make it there by Friday, that everything will work out according to Gods will. That if for some reason he doesnt make it that those responsibilities will fall evenly, lightly over those that can and are willing to lead, let them have peace and know that God's got this and he will equip them accordingly.
Pray for the families as they say goodbye to their loved ones and either this morning before work or at the airport, pray for the transition for those with young children, that life can be just distracting enough but that God will burden our hearts accordingly to pray for them as they need it. Pray that all things work out to communicate with their loved ones because although it will be difficult for those on the home front it will also be difficult for those on mission. Praying for strength and peace for all, because we know that God has great and powerful things ahead for this team.
I'll do my best to update you this week about how the trip is going, give you a glimpse of the things God is doing through these workers, and how he is working here at home. I'll also update you on prayer requests :) thanks friends many many blessings to all of you. May you follow the nudging and calling that God lays upon your heart no matter how scary or uncertain, because there is some beautiful miracles and blessings that come from that faithfulness and obedience.
*sorry for any misspelled words or misplaced words typing this on a mobile device has proven to be challenging...and it is 5 am 😳😊
Monday, October 13, 2014
7 days
There are only 7 days until this awesome group heads to India, we are anxious and excited, almost packed. All awaiting the flight that will take them there. Its hard to believe we are in the single digits. Prayers for preparations, for their team meeting tonight. prayers that as the days draw ever closer to departure, we can all focus on God and his plans and not on the distractions of the enemy. May God draw families closer, may the time together be sweeter and cherished. May any dissension that comes up be put to rest. May they accomplish everything they need to before they head out on their mission trip. Pray that light will be shown on schemes that the enemy throws at each member and their families, pray for strength, wisdom and discernment. Pray for peace, guidance, that they each may feel God daily as they prepare.
Pray for those that each team member will come in contact with while they are there. Pray that God will prepare their hearts and pave the way.
Thanks friends. Your prayers are felt and appreciated. God is working in such great and awesome ways in each of our lives and we look forward to looking back on all that has happened and what all will come from this trip :) May God bless you and keep you. May you feel him daily and know that he has gone before you.
Pray for those that each team member will come in contact with while they are there. Pray that God will prepare their hearts and pave the way.
Thanks friends. Your prayers are felt and appreciated. God is working in such great and awesome ways in each of our lives and we look forward to looking back on all that has happened and what all will come from this trip :) May God bless you and keep you. May you feel him daily and know that he has gone before you.
Friday, October 10, 2014
10 days...
When we were first approached about Daniel going to India it felt so far away but now look...only 10 more days?! The day pack is on its way, in search of a voltage converter, he has enough clothes, the money is raised, God continues to pave the way for him to go, we are slowly gathering snacks and the random other things we need. It blows my mind that it is so close, I have a feeling this knot in my stomach is here to stay for the next 29 days. So much lies ahead, my mind just cannot fathom.
Pray for the mission team and their families as they continue to gather and prepare for their trip. That God will renew their peace, that there will be reassurance, comfort and that the schemes of the enemy will fall upon deaf ears, that each person will recognize these distractions and call upon God. Pray that the time will be multiplied, that God will just continue to work in us and help us remember that he is ever present.
Psalm 16
Keep me safe, my God, for in you I take refuge
I say to the Lord, "You are my Lord; apart from you I have no good thing."
I say of the holy people who are in the land, "They are the noble ones in whom is all my delight."
Those who run after other gods will suffer more and more. I will not pour out libations of blood to such gods or take up their names on my lips.
Lord, you alone are my portion and my cup; you make my lot secure.
The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; surely I have a delightful inheritance.
I will praise the Lord, who counsels me; even at night my heart instructs me.
I keep my eyes always on the Lord. With him at my right hand I will not be shaken.
Therefore my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices; my body will rest secure,
because you will not abandon me to the realm of the dead, nor will you let your faithful one see decay.
You make known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand.
until we meet again...blessings and prayers brothers and sisters!
Pray for the mission team and their families as they continue to gather and prepare for their trip. That God will renew their peace, that there will be reassurance, comfort and that the schemes of the enemy will fall upon deaf ears, that each person will recognize these distractions and call upon God. Pray that the time will be multiplied, that God will just continue to work in us and help us remember that he is ever present.
Psalm 16
Keep me safe, my God, for in you I take refuge
I say to the Lord, "You are my Lord; apart from you I have no good thing."
I say of the holy people who are in the land, "They are the noble ones in whom is all my delight."
Those who run after other gods will suffer more and more. I will not pour out libations of blood to such gods or take up their names on my lips.
Lord, you alone are my portion and my cup; you make my lot secure.
The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; surely I have a delightful inheritance.
I will praise the Lord, who counsels me; even at night my heart instructs me.
I keep my eyes always on the Lord. With him at my right hand I will not be shaken.
Therefore my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices; my body will rest secure,
because you will not abandon me to the realm of the dead, nor will you let your faithful one see decay.
You make known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand.
until we meet again...blessings and prayers brothers and sisters!
Wednesday, October 8, 2014
Praying for India
Hi friends I pray this finds you doing well, it has been a crazy several weeks here as we have been praying and preparing for India. I mean at this point we cannot get India off our minds. Most of the time its overwhelming...other times...well actually its just overwhelming. Its always there, I can barely fathom what my hubby will experience in just 12 days when he arrives in Delhi. I pray for that. I've been praying for him and the rest of his team, for all the people in Delhi that they will bump elbows with, for the things that each of them will experience, for the obstacles that will arise, that each time something becomes a barrier we can turn that over to God.
Join me in praying for them. For us at home keeping up the day to day that we have strength and discernment, so that when they need it we can lift them up. I pray that they are on our hearts, that we know when to go before God on their behalf.
I cant imagine what lies ahead this afternoon let alone have any clue what stands before us in the coming 3 weeks but one thing that God keeps showing us over and over and over...he does. The best part we wont walk it alone. We never walk alone (Never Once https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n1bXG4WIesA)
Please join me in praying, for india, for peace, for guidance, for safety. that's all I have for you today friends...I'm going to try to post everyday in the next few weeks to update you on prayer requests, praises. After the trip I'll compile a post (or a few) to share with you all the ways God has worked through this mission trip! Until we meet again
Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer Romans 12:12
Therefore, my dear brothers and sisters, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain 1 Corinthians 15:58
Join me in praying for them. For us at home keeping up the day to day that we have strength and discernment, so that when they need it we can lift them up. I pray that they are on our hearts, that we know when to go before God on their behalf.
I cant imagine what lies ahead this afternoon let alone have any clue what stands before us in the coming 3 weeks but one thing that God keeps showing us over and over and over...he does. The best part we wont walk it alone. We never walk alone (Never Once https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n1bXG4WIesA)
Please join me in praying, for india, for peace, for guidance, for safety. that's all I have for you today friends...I'm going to try to post everyday in the next few weeks to update you on prayer requests, praises. After the trip I'll compile a post (or a few) to share with you all the ways God has worked through this mission trip! Until we meet again
Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer Romans 12:12
Therefore, my dear brothers and sisters, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain 1 Corinthians 15:58
Saturday, September 20, 2014
I rest in you....alone
Good evening friends and fellow Jesus people...I hope this finds you in a good place, one that despite the circumstances you find joy and peace that's my prayer for you today and always. As I sit here to write this blog that was pressed on my heart this afternoon, eating popcorn inspired by one of my best friends, in our quiet(ish) home, my boys (all three of them) are having a "campout" "guys only" night in the kids bedroom, worship music playing and it smells like chocolate cookies. This to me spells joy and peace...so much peace...
I'm writing to let you know its still a struggle daily but I'm still reminded DAILY where I need to rest, where I need to check the anxiety in and let it go. My Jesus, is simply incredible, he draws us near, holds us close and reassures us. Over the last month or so as India draws closer, the anxiety raises, questions flying a million miles an hour through my brain, doubts, wonder, awe, amazement all married together in the beautiful mess that is life. Will the money all come in that we need? Are we doing enough? how in the world am I going to survive with just me and the boys for 10 days....10 days without daddy?? <-- that's the kicker right now....
Here's the thing I'm in such a better place than I have been the anxiety, fear and worry aren't as suffocating as they were. Its still very present, its still a battle...however here is the beautiful part of that...my Jesus knew this season was coming and he arranged things to take my focus off of that and on to the things I love in life...the two big ones music and baking...this friends is where I meet my Jesus where I connect with him. The great thing about that is, is before we ever knew or thought about Daniel going to India, I told my friend I would help her raise money by doing a bake sale, because I love baking and God has really blessed me with that talent. So every week I have time with my friend, my Jesus, my music, baking, praying over each thing we make for each and every person because it brings us one step closer to the end goal.
Today my friend and I got together and were talking about her run this morning, I asked her how her 18 mile training run went. "Amazing" she said. --OK I don't know about you but that sounds crazy right?! I don't really like driving 18 miles let alone running them BUT she's been bitten by the same marathon bug as my hubs so alas I get it-- She was telling me about how because of her group runs she had stopped listening to her music as she ran. She had been really struggling with her long runs and even battling a little cold in the midst of training, which is very typical, she wasn't feeling the same peace, the same "lightness" when she was running as she once had. So this morning she decided to run with her music on and in just one ear. As she was running she was able to hold her head up high, relax her shoulders and just enjoy the run. Oceans (where my feet may fall) by hillsong came on close to the end of her run and she and three of her run buddies were able to connect over that song and over the songs that followed.
Last week after her run, it hit her hard she was struggling, it took her out...this week you would have never guessed she ran 18 miles. I may be assuming too much here but this really touched my spirit as she was telling me because we figured it out...and man its a DUH moment for me...so many times in the bible he calls us to rest in him, to turn over our burdens, to cast away our anxiety and to TRUST him so many times I loose sight of that simple truth and find myself drowning.
Over the last week or so I've been trying to stay ever present in the moment to praise him for the many blessings I have every single day. To thank him, to seek him, and keep him ever present in my thoughts. To turn to him when I'm struggling instead of just staying in my self misery.
So be encouraged friends. Find the thing in your life that you feel draws you the closest to God and just rest and LIVE right there, strive to live there. Oh man, its hard to describe, beautiful chaos, is what comes to mind, because he's transforming Angela's chaos...he's meeting me here where I'm at and drawing me ever closer and growing the areas I need to grow in.
Psalm 91:1-2
Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, "He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust."
Hebrews 10:35-36
So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised
Romans 8:26
In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans
Romans 15:13
May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.
until we meet again...seek him for your hope, peace and joy! Let us rest in him alone!!
I'm writing to let you know its still a struggle daily but I'm still reminded DAILY where I need to rest, where I need to check the anxiety in and let it go. My Jesus, is simply incredible, he draws us near, holds us close and reassures us. Over the last month or so as India draws closer, the anxiety raises, questions flying a million miles an hour through my brain, doubts, wonder, awe, amazement all married together in the beautiful mess that is life. Will the money all come in that we need? Are we doing enough? how in the world am I going to survive with just me and the boys for 10 days....10 days without daddy?? <-- that's the kicker right now....
Here's the thing I'm in such a better place than I have been the anxiety, fear and worry aren't as suffocating as they were. Its still very present, its still a battle...however here is the beautiful part of that...my Jesus knew this season was coming and he arranged things to take my focus off of that and on to the things I love in life...the two big ones music and baking...this friends is where I meet my Jesus where I connect with him. The great thing about that is, is before we ever knew or thought about Daniel going to India, I told my friend I would help her raise money by doing a bake sale, because I love baking and God has really blessed me with that talent. So every week I have time with my friend, my Jesus, my music, baking, praying over each thing we make for each and every person because it brings us one step closer to the end goal.
Today my friend and I got together and were talking about her run this morning, I asked her how her 18 mile training run went. "Amazing" she said. --OK I don't know about you but that sounds crazy right?! I don't really like driving 18 miles let alone running them BUT she's been bitten by the same marathon bug as my hubs so alas I get it-- She was telling me about how because of her group runs she had stopped listening to her music as she ran. She had been really struggling with her long runs and even battling a little cold in the midst of training, which is very typical, she wasn't feeling the same peace, the same "lightness" when she was running as she once had. So this morning she decided to run with her music on and in just one ear. As she was running she was able to hold her head up high, relax her shoulders and just enjoy the run. Oceans (where my feet may fall) by hillsong came on close to the end of her run and she and three of her run buddies were able to connect over that song and over the songs that followed.
Last week after her run, it hit her hard she was struggling, it took her out...this week you would have never guessed she ran 18 miles. I may be assuming too much here but this really touched my spirit as she was telling me because we figured it out...and man its a DUH moment for me...so many times in the bible he calls us to rest in him, to turn over our burdens, to cast away our anxiety and to TRUST him so many times I loose sight of that simple truth and find myself drowning.
Over the last week or so I've been trying to stay ever present in the moment to praise him for the many blessings I have every single day. To thank him, to seek him, and keep him ever present in my thoughts. To turn to him when I'm struggling instead of just staying in my self misery.
So be encouraged friends. Find the thing in your life that you feel draws you the closest to God and just rest and LIVE right there, strive to live there. Oh man, its hard to describe, beautiful chaos, is what comes to mind, because he's transforming Angela's chaos...he's meeting me here where I'm at and drawing me ever closer and growing the areas I need to grow in.
Psalm 91:1-2
Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, "He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust."
Hebrews 10:35-36
So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised
Romans 8:26
In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans
Romans 15:13
May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.
until we meet again...seek him for your hope, peace and joy! Let us rest in him alone!!
Friday, September 12, 2014
Hand Me Down Shoes...
It is so amazing how much I learn from our boys about faith, joy and how we should live life...they find joy in the simple things like running in the rain, new shoes or clothes, playing with friends, just being with those they love and adore.
The things I often take for granted...you see I often look around and instead of gratitude I feel overwhelmed...I often dream of giving away everything and the freedom that would come with that. This week as I was going through the boys things to see what they need for fall/winter (or in texas what we call a slightly cooler version of summer) I noticed that J's shoes were getting REALLY hard to put on...to find out that he outgrew them. That evening we went to a friends house where we were talking about how fast they outgrow things...She told me she had a pair of shoes we could have for him, the shoes are well loved...like most "hand me downs" from little boys...lets be real if there aren't holes did they ever really wear them?! I took them with gratitude thinking these will work for a little bit...as we got around the next morning J saw them. Let me tell you what...he could not contain his excitement about his NEW shoes.
Be still my heart...
Life with this boy has not been easy over the last few months...I mean he's four, and he wants to be independent, right and rule the world...without full understanding what that all entails :) Man the spirit in that boy...he's going to be a world changer...watch out...
But oh my goodness...gratitude and just pure joy...he LOVES these shoes he couldn't be prouder, he just loves wearing them. So much so that we have to take them away when hes not listening :)
As you all know I'm a worrier, I carry burdens I'm not intended too, I worry senselessly and often find out it was all unwarranted. As big of a battle this is with our sweet J...wow I get now why Jesus wanted the little children to come to him. The purity in their prayers, the willingness to turn to God with faith, to sing praises to God when they are uncertain. Witnessing this does this mommas heart good. I often wonder if I'm doing a good job and if this stay at home mom stuff is important...then they surprise me. God hears my hearts cry to just see a glimpse of hope...and I do...today he got some hand me down socks....
He CANNOT wait to wear them :)
Geez friends lets find joy in the hand me downs...in the mundane, the everyday, the things that we so often look down upon...they are still AMAZING gifts and I'm grateful not only for the shoes and socks but for the lesson that J has taught me through it. Praying that we all have a child like faith and joy... until we meet again!
The things I often take for granted...you see I often look around and instead of gratitude I feel overwhelmed...I often dream of giving away everything and the freedom that would come with that. This week as I was going through the boys things to see what they need for fall/winter (or in texas what we call a slightly cooler version of summer) I noticed that J's shoes were getting REALLY hard to put on...to find out that he outgrew them. That evening we went to a friends house where we were talking about how fast they outgrow things...She told me she had a pair of shoes we could have for him, the shoes are well loved...like most "hand me downs" from little boys...lets be real if there aren't holes did they ever really wear them?! I took them with gratitude thinking these will work for a little bit...as we got around the next morning J saw them. Let me tell you what...he could not contain his excitement about his NEW shoes.
Be still my heart...
Life with this boy has not been easy over the last few months...I mean he's four, and he wants to be independent, right and rule the world...without full understanding what that all entails :) Man the spirit in that boy...he's going to be a world changer...watch out...
But oh my goodness...gratitude and just pure joy...he LOVES these shoes he couldn't be prouder, he just loves wearing them. So much so that we have to take them away when hes not listening :)
As you all know I'm a worrier, I carry burdens I'm not intended too, I worry senselessly and often find out it was all unwarranted. As big of a battle this is with our sweet J...wow I get now why Jesus wanted the little children to come to him. The purity in their prayers, the willingness to turn to God with faith, to sing praises to God when they are uncertain. Witnessing this does this mommas heart good. I often wonder if I'm doing a good job and if this stay at home mom stuff is important...then they surprise me. God hears my hearts cry to just see a glimpse of hope...and I do...today he got some hand me down socks....
He CANNOT wait to wear them :)
Geez friends lets find joy in the hand me downs...in the mundane, the everyday, the things that we so often look down upon...they are still AMAZING gifts and I'm grateful not only for the shoes and socks but for the lesson that J has taught me through it. Praying that we all have a child like faith and joy... until we meet again!
Sunday, September 7, 2014
The Enemy Has been Defeated
Hi friends...I set out this morning to write this blog in a good place...its amazing how fast life can throw you curve balls. Attempts at distracting, drawing our attention away from the stuff that is important. Sadly they almost always work they send me reeling often spinning out of control wondering what is going on...only to find that fell for it again. Geez its frustrating and why cant I learn. Its a constant struggle to remind myself to daily put on the full armor of God to seek him first and draw close to him so that the time spent reeling is less. So that I'm not spinning out for long periods of time. we are called to pray without ceasing... I have found that when I start feeling like I'm drowning in the size of my worries, the anxiety that is weighing on my spirit, the negative thoughts that keep playing on repeat in my head.
I drown it all out...I do the things that bring me joy and center me. I turn to those in my life that can tell me the lies aren't true and remind me that I'm letting the enemy have control where he isn't allowed control. I turn to the word and search for those versus that my spirit needs to hear to be reminded to rest in the Holy Spirit and just trust.
In times that require great faith...or even just a little faith. I am quickly reminded of the spiritual battles going on around us, because I'm now engaging in it, I have chosen a side and that scares Satan because once we are called to move forward from waiting he knows his time is limited and he wants us stopped.
In the midst of the battle I'm often blindsided by the attacks, I so often forget to wake up each morning and put on the full armor of God
Ephesians 6:10-20
Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.
And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep praying for all the Lords people. Pray also for me, that whenever I speak, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel, for which I am an ambassador in chains. Pray that I may declare it fearlessly, as I should.
Everyday...in the morning when I rise this should be my prayer, my habits so that I am ready because we are engaging in the same battle Paul is talking about here in Ephesians.
You want to know something....a little secret maybe
every time I have sat down to write this I have this almost overwhelming sense of anxiety...it has been easy to be distracted or get stuck the words wouldn't flow...which tells me you need to hear this as much as I do...Friends its such a real battle that we so often forget we are fighting in.
We need to stand strong! We need to stand firm and we need to be prepared!
Pray about everything, if you are in constant communication with God you will know when to react and move forward even if it feels debilitating. Its possible to move forward in fear even when it feels paralyzing because we have something so much stronger than fear on our side!!
Take heart brothers and sisters, stand firm, and pray without ceasing, seek God and embrace his peace that is there, don't let the ploys of the enemy distract us or defeat us any longer.
Philippians 4
Don't worry about anything; instead, pray about everything: tell God your needs and don't forget to thank him for his answers. If you do this you will experience God's peace, which is far more wonderful than the human mind can understand. His peace will keep your thoughts and your hearts quiet and at rest as you trust in Christ Jesus.
Oh his peace...is so sweet...
We are all in this together. I'm praying for you and your battles. Lets join together and pray for each other as this battle is tough and one that is above our understanding.
Peace be with you until we meet again!!
Deuteronomy 28:7
The Lord will grand that enemies who rise up against you will be defeated before you. They will come at you from one direction but flee from you in seven.
I drown it all out...I do the things that bring me joy and center me. I turn to those in my life that can tell me the lies aren't true and remind me that I'm letting the enemy have control where he isn't allowed control. I turn to the word and search for those versus that my spirit needs to hear to be reminded to rest in the Holy Spirit and just trust.
In times that require great faith...or even just a little faith. I am quickly reminded of the spiritual battles going on around us, because I'm now engaging in it, I have chosen a side and that scares Satan because once we are called to move forward from waiting he knows his time is limited and he wants us stopped.
In the midst of the battle I'm often blindsided by the attacks, I so often forget to wake up each morning and put on the full armor of God
Ephesians 6:10-20
Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.
And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep praying for all the Lords people. Pray also for me, that whenever I speak, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel, for which I am an ambassador in chains. Pray that I may declare it fearlessly, as I should.
Everyday...in the morning when I rise this should be my prayer, my habits so that I am ready because we are engaging in the same battle Paul is talking about here in Ephesians.
You want to know something....a little secret maybe
every time I have sat down to write this I have this almost overwhelming sense of anxiety...it has been easy to be distracted or get stuck the words wouldn't flow...which tells me you need to hear this as much as I do...Friends its such a real battle that we so often forget we are fighting in.
We need to stand strong! We need to stand firm and we need to be prepared!
Pray about everything, if you are in constant communication with God you will know when to react and move forward even if it feels debilitating. Its possible to move forward in fear even when it feels paralyzing because we have something so much stronger than fear on our side!!
Take heart brothers and sisters, stand firm, and pray without ceasing, seek God and embrace his peace that is there, don't let the ploys of the enemy distract us or defeat us any longer.
Philippians 4
Don't worry about anything; instead, pray about everything: tell God your needs and don't forget to thank him for his answers. If you do this you will experience God's peace, which is far more wonderful than the human mind can understand. His peace will keep your thoughts and your hearts quiet and at rest as you trust in Christ Jesus.
Oh his peace...is so sweet...
We are all in this together. I'm praying for you and your battles. Lets join together and pray for each other as this battle is tough and one that is above our understanding.
Peace be with you until we meet again!!
Deuteronomy 28:7
The Lord will grand that enemies who rise up against you will be defeated before you. They will come at you from one direction but flee from you in seven.
Saturday, August 30, 2014
Steal, Kill and Destroy
I began this post several days ago and just couldn't get past a certain point once you reach the end that reason will probably be apparent...but after reading a post on facebook from a friend whose life looks a lot like ours right now I felt an urgency to share...
As you may have guessed by the last few blog there is a lot going on in our lives some of it not so pretty in fact most of it not pretty but there have been some pretty amazing things going on behind the scenes that I allowed my self miss. You see we made a huge commitment just a few short weeks ago and I have mentioned the peace I felt about that decision. Then when it came time to actually commit and sign up to send my hubby to India...oh man the stuff that happened as a result of that commitment.... Since then I have wallowed, our boys hit pre-adolescence, you know the whole I know more than you and better than you, not listening, ornery oh man especially that one. It's been rough for about a month but a whole lot worse since this commitment. Hubby's job has been great, super busy, but so many problems that he has had to fix or adjust. Not to mention my anxiety levels, as well as our youngest got a viral rash, thankfully not contagious, but it could last 2 months. Things have been about 10x harder...almost like we are swimming up stream everything just flying at you at a hundred miles an hour...
I wallowed there for a while especially when C came down with this rash that we had no idea what it was or how to make him feel better...it just felt dark, heavy, hard, and at times almost unbearable, very lonely, a very very tough time.
Then it hit me WHY I was feeling this way and WHY my friends who are also going to India are feeling much the same way. My "lightbub" moment you might say. While I sat there wallowing I let the enemy steal my joy, peace, strength...I allowed it my reaction to the situation wasn't to turn to the one I solely depend on for my joy I tried to muster it up, pull myself up from my bootstraps but I can't...I don't have the strength or the ability to pull myself out of that place.
It was sometime early early in the morning when my brain woke up and I thought of that verse, "The thief that comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full. John 10:10 " ...
so then I decided to fight this battle head on the enemy has no right to steal these things away from me. GOD through Jesus paid the ultimate price so that I have him to lean on and draw my strength from. So much better than my limited resources...am I right?!
Don't get stuck there...it's so hard, dark, lonely, depressing, heavy there. Its a burden we aren't called to carry alone...
every time I began dwelling this week I would remind myself of the promises of God, it helps me refocus and let go...which is really hard for me to do. the first verse that came to me was out of Matthew 11:28-30
"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."
Then I kept repeating cast all your anxiety on him...praying every time I fell into the temptation to wallow and rest where I was and I noticed a difference although it has still been hard we have had some answers and the best thing we haven't been carrying the burden alone. I started working with the boys on versus every day teaching them to call on God's word, praying over them teaching them the value of self control, and all good things in God's word. Its been a battle the great thing about it I'm not alone...We are not alone...You are not alone.
With God all things are possible call on him out of desperation and he will meet you there, with loving gentle caring arms and reassure you that it will all be ok and that the battle in the end will be worth it. Don't stay or dwell in the dark too long its suffocating and it isn't worth it...your savior doesn't want you to do this alone.
Praying for you my friends...Gods got this...He's got you...
I leave you with my favorite Hillsong United Song Oceans oh it touches my soul so deep right now :)
when oceans rise my soul will rest in your embrace for I am yours and you are mine
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1m_sWJQm2fs
As you may have guessed by the last few blog there is a lot going on in our lives some of it not so pretty in fact most of it not pretty but there have been some pretty amazing things going on behind the scenes that I allowed my self miss. You see we made a huge commitment just a few short weeks ago and I have mentioned the peace I felt about that decision. Then when it came time to actually commit and sign up to send my hubby to India...oh man the stuff that happened as a result of that commitment.... Since then I have wallowed, our boys hit pre-adolescence, you know the whole I know more than you and better than you, not listening, ornery oh man especially that one. It's been rough for about a month but a whole lot worse since this commitment. Hubby's job has been great, super busy, but so many problems that he has had to fix or adjust. Not to mention my anxiety levels, as well as our youngest got a viral rash, thankfully not contagious, but it could last 2 months. Things have been about 10x harder...almost like we are swimming up stream everything just flying at you at a hundred miles an hour...
I wallowed there for a while especially when C came down with this rash that we had no idea what it was or how to make him feel better...it just felt dark, heavy, hard, and at times almost unbearable, very lonely, a very very tough time.
Then it hit me WHY I was feeling this way and WHY my friends who are also going to India are feeling much the same way. My "lightbub" moment you might say. While I sat there wallowing I let the enemy steal my joy, peace, strength...I allowed it my reaction to the situation wasn't to turn to the one I solely depend on for my joy I tried to muster it up, pull myself up from my bootstraps but I can't...I don't have the strength or the ability to pull myself out of that place.
It was sometime early early in the morning when my brain woke up and I thought of that verse, "The thief that comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full. John 10:10 " ...
so then I decided to fight this battle head on the enemy has no right to steal these things away from me. GOD through Jesus paid the ultimate price so that I have him to lean on and draw my strength from. So much better than my limited resources...am I right?!
Don't get stuck there...it's so hard, dark, lonely, depressing, heavy there. Its a burden we aren't called to carry alone...
every time I began dwelling this week I would remind myself of the promises of God, it helps me refocus and let go...which is really hard for me to do. the first verse that came to me was out of Matthew 11:28-30
"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."
Then I kept repeating cast all your anxiety on him...praying every time I fell into the temptation to wallow and rest where I was and I noticed a difference although it has still been hard we have had some answers and the best thing we haven't been carrying the burden alone. I started working with the boys on versus every day teaching them to call on God's word, praying over them teaching them the value of self control, and all good things in God's word. Its been a battle the great thing about it I'm not alone...We are not alone...You are not alone.
With God all things are possible call on him out of desperation and he will meet you there, with loving gentle caring arms and reassure you that it will all be ok and that the battle in the end will be worth it. Don't stay or dwell in the dark too long its suffocating and it isn't worth it...your savior doesn't want you to do this alone.
Praying for you my friends...Gods got this...He's got you...
I leave you with my favorite Hillsong United Song Oceans oh it touches my soul so deep right now :)
when oceans rise my soul will rest in your embrace for I am yours and you are mine
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1m_sWJQm2fs
Sunday, August 24, 2014
Swimming
I think one of the hardest things about being a parent is
trusting they are truly ready and its time to let go and let them. It is in
these moments I feel as though my heart just stops, along with breathing, all
bodily functions cease, because I’m amazed at my child. This little boy…who was
born yesterday right?! Is big enough to do these things, and its soooo hard for
this momma to believe, how is it possible?!
Today he went to “big” church with us for the first time in
years and he was so excited. He loved it. He was great at it. J is four…four. Four
years ago today he was a little over 3 months old and OH MY GOODNESS the
sweetest baby, he went to big church with us when he was oh so little and
worshipped with us. It was surreal today, in some ways it was just like four
years ago in other ways so different.
Where has time gone?! Somehow by the grace of God he’s
turning into such an incredible young man…who will start home school preschool tomorrow.
In some ways I want time to just stop so I can just hold him, love him, and
breathe in who he is right now. Four so far has had challenges but man he’s so
fun and independent.
He loves to color, run, ride his bike (with his helmet of
course), playing with friends, food/cooking, his favorite color is green, he
loves taking pictures and videos. He’s strong, bold, loving, and sensitive,
this boy has a heart for all people, he’s passionate. He still has his favorite
orange and blue dump truck from his first birthday that he races with his
brother. His favorite thing this summer swimming…be still my heart.
He has always enjoyed playing in the pool but this summer he
learned to swim. I’m still not 100% sure how but he decided one day a month or
so ago that he wanted to “sink” without his floatie, I figured it would be
short lived boy was I wrong. From sinking and bouncing back up…to swimming. He
did it on his own. This boy spoils me in so many ways… J can literally do
ANYTHING he puts his mind to. My heart still stops a little every time he jumps
into the pool and swims oh so effortlessly to the stairs.
Oh how God equips us to love these boys and cheer them on…I don’t
know how I would do it without him and my continuous life line of prayer. Whether
its safe travels to and from errands, or safety as we swim and try new things,
to discernment to know how to mother these gifts. He is my strength on the many
stressful, overwhelming days, my comfort.
Motherhood has opened my eyes to unconditional love in ways
that are inconceivable, how is it possible to love someone so deeply it hurts,
that in an instant you would choose to die for them, I choose them…oh man I’m
thankful for them and broken by them. As frustrating and trying as they can be,
even when the days are weeks long, and I wonder why I couldn’t wait to have children….I
wouldn’t change it for the world.
I love the Lord, for he heard my voice; he heard my cry for mercy. Because he turned his ear to me, I will call on him as long as I live.Psalm 116:1-2 NIV
Start children off on the way they should go,
and even when they are old they will not turn from it.
and even when they are old they will not turn from it.
Proverbs 22:6
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